Monday, November 22, 2010

Child Depression

We have moved quite a bit since we got married. In 8 years we have had three kids and moved 9 times. The last three moves seem to be the most telling. On Friday we had parent teacher conferences. Aidan's teacher mentioned that he was stressed, moping around, and should see the school counselor. We agreed that would be a good thing. Obviously the move across the country to Pittsburgh was affecting our little man.

We also decided that we would talk to his pediatrician as well. Today I took Aidan to the doctor. He said that he felt Aidan could have child depression and recommended a couple of therapists. I talked to the office nurse who worked for their therapist. She suggested we call a specific office and find the right fit for Aidan. She spoke to the office therapist who said that we should take care of Aidan's anxiety issues right away.

Everyone agrees that this is a time sensitive issue.

I can't help but wonder how much of my own depression is affecting my kids.

I know that I need to give Aidan more of my time. The baby gets the majority of my time. Audrey has been demanding more of it. Aidan just goes along playing with his toys or reading.

It's not like I'm playing with the baby in a corner and ignoring my big kids. I'm doing dishes, laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, running errands... I'm busy all day long. I don't have a single moment that I'm not doing something for the kids, the house, my husband. I'm exhausted.

Hopefully the pediatric therapist is able to give Aidan tools for coping with anxiety. Maybe I can try them out myself.

In th eend I think this is a good thing. We're all learning how to cope.


XLMIC said...

Here's what I think... therapist for Aidan, therapist for YOU, a part-time helper in the house so you can focus a little occasionally on the older kids (just maybe an afternoon a week where you can pick them up from school w/o Analie and do something big kid oriented... you could even alternate special days w/ each of the older two), find a yoga class or gym or something nearby where you could go and workout near other people... a place that has childcare so there might be other moms who are interested in fitness (like you) and have little kids not in school (like you). And don't be shy about interviewing therapists... it took me about 11 interviews before I found the right one for each of our two kids. People said I was nuts/stupid/wasting time/etc. but I did find the best match for each of them. I agree, you need to find at least one good buddy. So does Aidan. That will turn both of your worlds around. Thinking of you and sending (((HUGS)))!

Anonymous said...

Poor Aidan... Surround him with more attention, love, things to play and do. Have a special "Aidan and Mommy" day. Even if the dishes don't get done or the laundry sits in the basement. Hire someone else to do that stuff and pour your extra effort into Aidan. Love you, mama. -Adinah

Julie Anne said...

I can absolutely see how this can happen. All these feelings with an entirely new world are totally legit.What I would think is help him to see that what he's feeling is okay. When I have struggled with depression I felt like was I CRAZY, that I was the only person going through this, that I was ungrateful, or not happy being a mom. I would hate for him to think he's a weird little kid needing all this "help." What I realized opening up to others is that a lot of people go through them, is almost a part of the human experience. A therapist helped a ton. I am happy, I love being a mom, I just needed a little help coping.

I am praying for you guys.

Julie Anne said...

I agree with the cleaning lady. I have someone come for an hour once a month (pretty much just for the bathrooms) And there was never a $15 better spent :)

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I am an identical twin. I am married with three children currently residing in PA. From California. Attended three high schools in three states and seven colleges in three states in seven years. I have a degree in photography and journalism